In my last post, I asked the question, "does Facebook make people anti-social?" Perhaps it does with some people. I talked about a certain family member who was hurt by what her daughter said to her. My wife told her that it may be best to take a break from Facebook for a while. She kind of agreed, and was considering leaving. However, she did not.
Facebook's gravitational pull is too great for many. A life without Facebook is terrifying to many in our modern world. People are expected to either be on Facebook or be viewed as social pariahs. Furthermore, there is often a backlash from family and friends who are on Facebook when one leaves. "Why did you leave us?" they cry. In fact, when a Facebook user goes to deactivate their profile, shown is a few friends with text saying that each one will miss you.
Instead of leaving Facebook, the individual has set herself up for more heartache. Similar situations have erupted on Facebook over the course of the last few years. Some people use Facebook as a medium to control others. Others use Facebook as a medium to make others feel awful about the world and their lives. For my sister-in-law, she uses Facebook as a way to tell her family (particularly her mother) how they raised her wrong all of her life and to brag about her adult life. Happy mother's day.
My wife's mother has battled with the idea of leaving Facebook for a while now. In fact, she once stated that she was not addicted to Facebook. I think that most people are. In fact, I believe if someone 'battles leaving Facebook but does not' then they are addicted. There is no way around it. To the addicted, contrary information, such as this website, is ignored. Many addicts have no want to hear that they are addicted, nor do they want to change. In fact, even with the heartache that Facebook causes these people, a fear of the world outside of Facebook makes them too afraid to leave.
My wife's father, however, did leave Facebook. He realized that Facebook was not conductive to a real adult life in a real adult world. In fact, he was sick of the behavior that many hardcore users exhibit on the site. The strutting around like an internet rooster. The behaving like a donkey in the barnyard. The incredulous lack of judgement that many Facebook users show. The internet brings out the worst in people. From message boards to internet chat rooms, people can be downright vile on the internet. Facebook makes it worse, because, many of these people are doing it to their families and best friends. Those who society says we should love the most.
In the last few years I have seen both my family and my wife's family fall apart. From outright cheating on spouses to using Facebook as a medium for the disowning of siblings, Facebook has reeked serious havoc. Before leaving I constantly read horrible things being said about family members right on the site. Family fights erupted for the world to see. And yet people ask me why I am not on Facebook. I believe that we become that which we behold. I did not want to turn into such a person. I did not want to be a part of the negativity. I had found that Facebook was a very negative website across the board. Sadly, many people do not see it. Instead, they think Facebook is just a way to keep in touch. Yet, there is an element that brings out the worst in humanity there. Perhaps it's the war to get likes. People will destroy each other for a few likes. Facebook likes are like cocaine to some.
My wife's mother eventually sent an e-mail to my sister-in-law and within seconds replied and invited my wife's mother to yet another birthday party. They went. Perhaps out of fear of the backlash that would be caused on the site if they said no. Perhaps they truly wanted to go, even though the daughter humiliated her and made her feel like a genuine buffoon and certified lummox. Everything should be a-ok for the next few weeks. Of course, the Facebook pawn will show herself again and rape and pillage for the world to see. That's how it goes down in Facebook town.