If you are married, considering getting married, or dating, or even being involved in a relationship, you may ask: is Facebook worth the risk to the relationship? You may be surprised to learn that the (a)social media king is having a detrimental effect on relationships.
I have outlined a few articles below that talk in more detail about the risks that are involved with Facebook in the matrimonial context. In fact, I know first hand of individuals who have broken up due to social networking sites. One of which actually caught her husband with a 'secret' MySpace account courting young women mere months after he was married!
The temptation on these sites is real. Think about it. They allow flirting and romantic behavior with little immediate consequence. It is easy to hide an illicit relationship from your spouse or partner. In fact, since people generally only share the positive and attractive aspects about themselves and their lives, the people on Facebook may seem more desirable than even those you see daily in real life.
Pictures on Facebook can easily be doctored. Images distorted. Anyone can claim anything. A person can claim that he/she is far more successful than he/she actually is. Perhaps he/she claims to have graduated from a fine university when in reality he/she took one class there? A person can claim to possess skills and experience that they don't fully possess. And with (a)social media, people are craving social interaction, and it is lacking. In fact, while people have hundreds of friends on Facebook and similar sites, the reality is that they may not be very social in the real world. Is having a hundred acquaintances better than having a few real close friends? Most people would agree that being in a close relationship with someone is far superior than an online relationship with someone you barely know, or who you think you know.
It is sad how many marriages end in divorce. Statistics claim that half of marriages end in divorce. While these numbers may be slightly skewed for various reasons, the reality is that at least some if not many of those divorces are a proximate cause of cheating on Facebook.
The urge to pursue an illicit relationship on Facebook is real. The urge is only natural. However, I ask you to purge the urge. Shut down your Facebook and try a week or two without it. See if your life changes. Can you do it? Can you get rid of the temptation for a week? If you can't leave, or if you are flirting with someone behind your spouse's/partner's back, I implore you to at least try. If Facebook is more important than the vows you gave on your wedding day, or the desire you once felt toward that person who you thought you wanted to be with, then that truly is an injustice. Is an (a)social networking site worth a destroyed family life. Do you have children or a life that you worked years for? If so, then the call is more dire. There is NOTHING to lose by leaving Facebook, only MUCH to gain. In the following days I will be going deeper into the subject of Facebook and marriage/relationships. I will be outlining some of the articles below and discussing them in more detail.
If you have a relationship that was destroyed due to Facebook or other (a)social networking sites, please leave a comment, or share your story. There are many people who are interested in reading.
- ^ Divorce cases get the Facebook factor. - MEN Media. Published January 19, 2011. Retrieved 13 March, 2012.
- ^ Facebook's Other Top Trend of 2009: Divorce - Networkworld. Published December 22, 2009. Retrieved 13 March, 2012.
- ^ "Facebook to Blame for Divorce Boom". Fox News. April 12, 2010.
- ^ Facebook is divorce lawyers' new best friend - MSNBC. Published 28 June, 2010. Retrieved 13 March, 2012.
- ^ "Facebook flirting triggers divorces". The Times Of India. January 1, 2012